By: Dr. Nikki LeToya White original post written July 4, 2009
Hi, I'm feeling kinda lonely this Christmas holiday with the hubby gone over the road. I wrote a popular blog post 14 years ago that resulted me in becoming a marriage and family counselor and wellness coach to wounded women.. .
Today I'm sharing the repost here on my new platform Spiced Life Conversation. I praise the women who don't see their men for weeks at time, you girls are strong! If you struggle with managing a one-sided relationship or long distance marriage this article is for you. I hope it encourages you to stay strong.
People don’t have a clue about being a wife of a trucker. They look at you like you got it made. “As if!” Being a trucker’s wife is a hard job.
Being a trucker’s wife and a mother on top of that is even harder.
Not only do the wife have to muli-task, housework, laundry, run errands, pay the bills, when and if she receives a check from her husband. But, she also has the task of caring for the needs of their children school work, cooking, after school activities. In if she has an outside job Lord help her.
A trucker wife has to manage and balance the income while her husband is away. She has to do the oil changes on the cars, any repairs that need to be meet, and let’s not forget about that forest that grows in the front yard yes, “mow the lawn.”
She has to be a mom and dad to the children, along with running her husband errands. A trucker wife has to make sure things run as smooth as possible while her better half is on the road.
A trucker’s wife dream of a fairy tale marriage was buried when that eighteen wheel giant pulled up to her front doorstep. Now she has to deal with the love of her life being gone 75% of the time, while she’s home alone taking care of the fort.
She has to deal with the public in their opinion that do not have a clue, nor understand what our way of life is all about. She constantly has to defend her husbands profession and the choices that they both make for their family, each and everyday of her life.
She has to deal with being alone and having to protect her family and keep everything secure so her self and her kids will not be harmed if anyone tries to intrude into their space.
A trucker’s wife has to deal with her parents and In-laws with their comments and opinions. She has to sit back in smile at the family gatherings and on the holidays when her husband is unable to be home enjoying a nice birthday or Thanksgiving holiday. She has to hold her head high and sacrifice celebrating her wedding anniversary and other special occasions on another day of the year.
When her husband comes home she has to put her life on hold so she can enjoy and relax for the 1-2 days her husband is home. Along with satisfying his needs, washing extra loads of clothes and bedding and put up with his some time grouchiness from being tired and not wanting to go out or visit family or events with her. She has to listen to him b**** about the conditions out there on the road and with the shippers, brokers, and customers. She has to be the support system he needs to release his frustration and pain when the time calls for it. She has to listen to him grip about money, how expensive things are on the road, asking can she cut back on something to make it better for this or that reasons. Like her budget isn’t already tight enough.
She has to have trust and faith in her mate, not to accuse him of cheating. A trucker’s wife life isn’t an easy one. It’s a demanding one who has to be independent, strong willed, patient, very tolerant, and understanding. If you really care for your husband you will have no problem with the sacrifices and changes you will have to deal with in the trucking industry.
With trust and communication you will be able to deal with the daily trails and tribulations of the trucking industry. Your marriage will make it!
ARE YOU LOOKING TO DIVE DEEPER INTO SELF-CARE?
I Can Help in Developing A Plan For Self Care
Do you want help developing a self care plan that works for your own busy schedule? Do you want accountability implementing a self care plan? If you or someone you love is struggling to maintain optimal mental and emotional health, consider reaching out to Spiced Life Conversation Art Wellness Studio and Botanica. We are a Metro Atlanta, Conyers Georgia area. We are a coaching and counseling practice with empathetic, skilled counselors and recovery coaches who can help you set goals, develop a self care routine and move forward to build a more fulfilling life. Our team would be happy to work with you either just for a couple of sessions to develop and implement a Self Care plan or longer term to work toward overall better mental health within our membership site or other programs.
About The Author:
Dr. Nikki LeToya White MSEd-TL, Ph.D. RHN is the founder, director and a full time board certified trauma-informed nutritionist, folk herbalist, and wellness consultant at Spiced Life Conversation Art Wellness Studio and Botanica. She created Spiced Life Conversation, LLC Art Wellness Studio and Botanica to provide the Metro Atlanta area with a counseling and coaching services where clients are carefully matched with the right program for healing abandonment and childhood emotional neglect trauma that cause codependency, emotional eating, financial stress, and imposter syndrome as it relates to fear of success and being abandon. We help you begin your emotional healing journey with ease. Recently, we have expanded to include online membership site so we now provide support to people living all over the world. All of our recovery coaches provide at least one evidence based treatment to assist in your recovery. Dr. White is a big proponent of self care and helping people live a fulfilling life! She has been in full remission with both codependency and emotional binge eating disorder since 2016. In live a life in recovery from sugar addiction. Loving her low sugar balance lifestyle.
Dr. Nikki LeToya White